journey through wonder…

“Sleep” by Frances MacDonald

Dreaming is a journey through wonder, surprise, and freedom.
~ Anthony Lawlor
(A Home for the Soul)

A dream is a massive magic trick of the mind.
No amount of science could explain away the mysterious wonder.
~ Dave Matthews
(Twitter, November 14, 2008)

Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake.
~ Henry David Thoreau
(A Week on the Concord & Merrimack Rivers)

There is nothing like a dream to create the future.
~ Victor Hugo
(Les Misérables: A Novel)

off-center and in-between…

photo by Barbara Rodgers

Life is a good teacher and a good friend.  Things are always in transition, if we could only realize it.  Nothing ever sums itself up in the way that we like to dream about.  The off-center, in-between state is an ideal situation, a situation in which we don’t get caught and we can open our hearts and minds beyond limit.  It’s a very tender, nonaggressive, open-ended state of affairs.
~ Pema Chödrön
(When Things Fall Apart)

beneath the snow…

“Village in the Snow” by Paul Gauguin

I do an awful lot of thinking and dreaming about things in the past and the future – the timelessness of the rocks and the hills – all the people who have existed there.  I prefer winter and fall, when you feel the bone structure in the landscape – the loneliness of it – the dead feeling of winter.  Something waits beneath it – the whole story doesn’t show.  I think anything like that – which is contemplative, silent, shows a person alone – people always feel is sad.  Is it because we’ve lost the art of being alone?
~ Andrew Wyeth
(LIFE, May 14, 1965)

kaleidoscope…

“Ramada Inn” ~ Neil Young & Crazy Horse

When music is your life, there is a key that gets you to the core.  I am so grateful that I still have Crazy Horse, knock on wood.  You see, they are my window to the cosmic world where the muse lives and breathes.  I can find myself there and go to the special area of my soul where those songs graze like buffalo.  The herd is still there, and the plains are endless.  Just getting there is the key thing, and Crazy Horse is my way of getting there.  That is the place where music lives in my soul.  It is not youth, time, or age.  I dream of playing those long jams and floating over the herd like a condor.  I dream of the changing wind playing on my feathers, my brothers and sisters around me, silently telling their stories and sharing their spirits with the sky.  They are my life.
~ Neil Young
(Waging Heavy Peace)

Nevergreen Caverns

Nevergreen Caverns created by David D. J. Rau
photos by Barbara Rodgers

Tym-Brrr is the faerie of tree stumps and dead wood, a subject often depicted in the foreground of landscape paintings.  Twisted and broken trees suggest the awesome power of nature; the aftermath of a lightning storm or strong winds.  Tree stumps, on the other hand, humanize an otherwise wild scene.  Tym-Brr eats and plays in one cave, sleeps in another, and stores his sailboat for seeking out driftwood in the third.  Clues to how trees become “never green” are burned into the outer walls.
(Wee Faerie Village: Land of Picture Making)

Fairies are invisible and inaudible like angels.
But their magic sparkles in nature.
~ Lynn Holland
(A Faerie Treasury)

Folding Shirts

 ”The Ages of Life” by Georges Lacombe

We all grow up with the weight of history on us.  Our ancestors dwell in the attics of our brains as they do in the spiraling chains of knowledge hidden in every cell of our bodies.  These spirits form our lives, and they may reveal themselves in mere trivialities – a quirk of speech, a way of folding a shirt.  From the earliest days of my life, I encountered the past at every turn, in every season.
~ Shirley Abbott
(Womenfolks: Growing Up Down South)

Early this morning I was awakened by a dream, one of those slice-of-life dreams that seems profound in some way.  In the dream my father was young again, folding a pile of his fresh white t-shirts, as he used to do so meticulously on his laundry day.  Padding over to the computer, I soon discovered our internet connection was down…  So…  I started looking through my quote collection to find one to go with the painting above, and smiled at the ‘folding a shirt’ connection to my dream.

I have the feeling I’ll be taking a leave of absence from blogging for now.  Friday I had a root canal and other dental work done under conscious sedation, and the effects of the sedation didn’t wear off completely until late Saturday.  Tim had some dental work done on Monday as well and both of us are still recuperating and on pain meds.

Meanwhile things have reached a crisis level with my aunt, who is 97.  She now needs full-time care and seems to be declining rather quickly.  She’s not eating and losing weight rapidly.  Another aunt is in town and was working at finding her a place in a nursing home, but my long-suffering sister has decided that she would rather move Auntie into my father’s house so she and her husband can care for both her and Dad.  Fortunately they have an appointment with an agency to get some professional in-home assistance, and an appointment with Hospice, too.

Both of Auntie’s sons predeceased her, but her granddaughter, who lives in Tennessee, is in town now as well.  She doesn’t want to die alone, so the aim is to keep her surrounded by those who love her.

Nothing is here to stay
Everything has to begin and end
A ship in a bottle won’t sail
All we can do is dream that the wind will blow us across the water
A ship in a bottle set sail
~ Dave Matthews
♫ (Baby) ♫

I have been assigned the task of planning for a simple cremation by-passing the cost of and toxic chemicals used at funeral homes.  This research is bringing up all kinds of emotions.  On the one hand it makes sense to be ready with a plan, but the very act of planning seems cold and calculating somehow…  Grave Matters: A Journey Through the Modern Funeral Industry to a Natural Way of Burial by Mark Harris has been helpful.  I wish there was a natural cemetery in Connecticut, but since there isn’t, cremation seems best.

Things have changed a lot since my mother died twenty-one years ago.  Online I found the Cremation Society of New England.  If I understand what I’m reading correctly, one can fill out forms online and have plans in place for when the last moment has arrived.  But I will have to read this over a little at a time…

I love the painting at the top of this post, “The Ages of Life.”  It seems to be a stage in a play.  The woman in the lower right corner makes me think of Auntie, left widowed at such a young age.  And now she seems to be the black figure with the cane in the background, quietly leaving the scene.

Okefenokee Swamp IV

In a swamp, as in meditation, you begin to glimpse how elusive, how inherently insubstantial, how fleeting our thoughts are, our identities.  There is magic in this moist world, in how the mind lets go, slips into sleepy water, circles and nuzzles the banks of palmetto and wild iris, how it seeps across dreams, smears them into the upright world, rots the wood of treasure chests, welcomes the body home.
~ Barbara Hurd
(Stirring the Mud: On Swamps, Bogs & Human Imagination)

A sandhill crane…

An egret…

As darkness fell we headed back through the swamp to the visitor center.

photos by Tim Rodgers

It was too cloudy to see the full moon, but as we learned on this trip, we often didn’t get to see what we expected see, but what we were granted to see was more than enough to fill us with gratitude.